Worried

I swear this damned deployment is going to give me an ulcer.  Or some other physical manifestation of my stress and worrying.  I know I just mentioned that there are big things happening in the region that Gunnar's unit is in, and just like that, it was reality.  A friend of mine got the dreaded scripted message call from her FRG (Family Readiness Group) yesterday.  They start off with "First of all, your husband is fine..." and then take it from there.  Someone else's husband was not fine though.  Gunnar is in Delta Company, where my friend's husband is in Charlie Company.  It was a soldier in Charlie Company that was killed this week.  Not my friend's husband, someone else in C-Co.  I don't know if I made any sense just now.  Basically this is the closest casualty that we've heard of in their unit.  And it scares the shit out of me.  I know rationally that if anything happened to Gunnar, I would know about it very, very quickly.  But just knowing there was someone else so close that was killed is crazy. 

I wasn't this worried about Gunnar's safety at any point in this deployment.  I always had so much confidence that he is a badass soldier and he's going to come back home to me and our kids just fine.  But hearing that story yesterday really made me stop and wonder if I'm an idiot for feeling that way.  I just need to get through the next few months!!