Emotional Rollercoaster

I'm feeling completely blah today.  Going from instant messaging Gunnar a few times a day for a few weeks to an abrupt halt in communication is really tough.  There are new reports every day of the escalated fighting in Afghanistan and this month marks the deadliest since the war started 9 years ago.  It's so hard to be this nervous and worried for this long.  It really is.  And this deployment completely kicked my butt today.  I had a very pathetic, oh-woe-is-me, stay in pajamas all day long, watch 4 Grey's Anatomy re-runs type of day.  My kids were fantastic to indulge me in such a lame day of parenting.  But, in my own defense, they are clean and fed and I did play Candyland 4,829 times today.  I know logically that he is doing fine.  Fighting a lot, but doing fine.  I just really need him to tell me this himself.  And soon.