So our last date didn't turn out too be all that magical. Because of timing, children etc we just hung around the house till I had to drop Gunnar off. We made BLT's, had leftover potato salad and were mostly really quiet. I didn't want to make things harder than they already were going to be and Gunnar HATES to see me cry, so it was just easier to not talk. What else was there to say really? After Mom came home from work, Gunnar and I jumped in the car and headed out. We drove in silence, every time I opened my mouth to speak, I got all choked up and stopped myself. I made sure to turn the radio off so I wouldn't remember any songs from the car ride and cry every time I hear it again for the rest of my life. We said our goodbyes and I drove back home. We texted and talked that night a lot. Which was really very helpful.
Yesterday morning Mom and I packed up the kids to go watch Gunnar swear in. We got there early and were able to hang out for a while. We split before the official swear in only because it was taking forever and the kids were getting tired and antsy. I could see so much in Gunnar's eyes. He has never been very emotional or talkative about his feelings. But there was so much in his eyes yesterday morning - it felt like my heart was actually going to break. He was sorrowful and I could tell he was starting to wonder if he was making the right decision. The longer we stayed there, the harder it was going to be for him. So I said goodbye (again) and got out of there. Gunnar spent the majority of the day at Port Columbus airport. His flight wasn't till 6pm so there was a lot of down time. We talked a lot again all day and he said so many really amazingly sweet things. I saved every single text that made me say "Aww" - my cell phone's memory is going to be shot pretty darn quick with this little adventure. There were some detours here and there and Gunnar ended up flying to Dallas, then into Oklahoma City really late last night. The last bus to Fort Sill had already departed so good old Uncle Sam put Gunnar and another fellow up for the night at a nearby hotel. I think it all worked out for the best though because Gunnar was able to have a really nice relaxing evening and good night's rest before heading to Fort Sill this morning. He arrived around 2pm this afternoon. This is the text he sent me from the bus
"just loaded the bus for fort sill. Walking out into the warm air it kind of hit me, a big smile came to my face and in some weird way I feel like I am heading back home. I know that this is going to be tough on us baby. The days and nights of not being together, the missed birthdays, the missed holidays, the lonliness. But I think it will all be worth it in the long run. I can promise that the next few years will be an adventure and that I love you and so happy we are in this together."
I don't know how he knew this is exactly what I needed to hear from him but it was like a huge sigh of relief.
Gunnar and I at MEPS (Military Entrance Processing Something-or-other) yesterday morning.
Gunnar on the bus from Oklahoma City to Fort Sill - he looks happy and ready. And that's all I needed to know.